Zumba! Really?

OK! OK! Zumba...! The newest exercise craze to hit America.  The fun new way to work off calories!  You swing and sway to Latin music and you loose weight without even realizing it! ...Who are you kidding?

I TRIED to try Zumba on Sunday at my gym.  I did!  I wanted to like Zumba.  I wanted to LOVE Zumba.  I mean who wouldn't?  On several occasions, I've seen the instructor come in with sequined mini skirts or waist wraps for her class so that they could "feel" the dance.  So, of course I wanted to try Zumba.  Again, I wanted to LOVE Zumba.  And so, I gave it the "ol college try".  I did!  I gave it at least... 30 seconds!  True effort!   Right?

Can I hear it for all of the other old ladies that thought they could actually dance?  For all of the "retired" cheerleaders that led their squads in a rousing yet perfectly choreographed rendition of "Let the sunshine in" back in high school.  Nothing less than art!   Or the gals that "took ballet" as a child and has always said,  "I  have a heart for dance".  "Dance is in my sole!   You KNOW us!  I mean, we've all thought we were better dancers than we actually were at some time in our lives, right?   Even you guys!  (YOU know who you are!  WE know who you are!) No one is immune to thinking they can dance.  We've seen the videos, remember?!  Oooooh the wedding videos!

And so it was on Sunday.  I thought I could dance or at least follow a "routine"... which was anything but!   I along with 20 other women (and one man-you go man!) who also thought they could dance took Zumba.   Now, I'm not one to throw stones, but the only person in that class that knew what they were doing was our perky Zumba instructor!  And I'm not convinced she knew either... meow!

With the three walls of mirrors, music that the instructor kept saying, "the music just isn't working today"...?  "I can't FEEL" it!  "What's wrong with this (sound) system?"  "Maybe I should turn it up"?   Really?  I heard it just fine!  It was blaring!   But nonetheless, I tried.   Without any instruction or introduction we were led in a Zumba "workout".

The moves were completely new to me so without knowing in advance what to expect, I was lost.  Never even saw it coming!  I hadn't even seen those moves on MTV.  (That is still on TV isn't it?)  Or even on  Dancing with the Stars.  (Yes old people dancing with other OLD people.) Where was the Latin swaying I had heard so much about?  Within seconds the moves began to develop into a fully choreographed arrangement of contemporary dance, none of which I'd had ever seen much less participated in!  So I did what any other self respecting 47 year old would do. I quickly and quietly exited the studio with only a smile and a wave with my ambition to try "the newest exercise craze" completely gone!

For those of you out there that love Zumba.  I say "more power to ya"!  But for me,  Zumba isn't quite "it".  Maybe another class, another day, another instructor,  I don't know?  But the only advise I will give to those of you who THINK you're good at Zumba or THINK you're a  "Zumbie";  look in the mirrors!  They're there for a reason!